Andrea's Voice Blog

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Posted by on in Other Musings from Doris
Welcome to Andrea's Voice Blogs! Please join me every week for words of wisdom from Andrea and my own sharings!  ...
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Posted by on in In the News
Those of you are regulars to this blog know what a fan I am of the "Dear Carolyn" advice columnist, Carolyn Hax. Her responses to some often very bizarre situations are repeatedly right-on. Even run-of-the-mill family issues are dealt with respectfully, directly and with a steadfast wisdom. Her column, "Mom frustrated by grandparents who come up short," published Jan 3rd is no exception.  A "Disillusioned Mama" writes about her divorced in-laws apparent lack of interest or love for their grandchildren. She sums up her question, Now, here is the core of the issue. I married into a highly dysfunctional family, and the result is my kids now suffer. As an only child, I had dreamed of marrying and creating a warm, extended family for my children with loving aunts, uncles, cousins and especially grandparents. On my side of the family, my cousins, their kids and my aunts and uncles embrace and celebrate my children. How do I resolve this? How do I explain to my children, who deserve to be loved and valued by the people around them, that these relatives are the losers in the equation? Carolyn gives a great preamble of possible reasons for the grandparents' behaviors, but this is conjecture on her part.  She sums up what is "known" given what the Mama wrote: You dreamed of a warm, extended family for your kids. Then you married into a highly dysfunctional family. And you didn’t adjust your dreams accordingly. That last line says it all. How many times...
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A month ago, I became aware of a talented blogger, Kelly Flanagan, PhD (thank you, Tom) with this right-on post about the real source of his daughter's beauty.  By now, you've probably heard about it via other outlets, as this father's perspective has gone viral.Matter-of-fact, Dr. Kelly and his 4-year-old daughter will appear on the TODAY Show on NBC Thursday, February 27th, as part of national eating disorders and body acceptance week. A few days ago, he wrote an addendum of sorts to this blog. His vigilant readers took exception to one of his opening statements, “When you have a daughter you start to realize she’s just as strong as everyone else in the house—a force to be reckoned with, a soul on fire with the same life and gifts and passions as any man.” They asked, “But what about all the women you knew before your daughter? What about your wife?” Point. His ultimate response: "Good catch." WOW! Humble public ownership of an embarrassing slip...how rare is that? And how refreshing...he states, "If we’re afraid of being caught in the act of our own immaturity, we will forever be afraid to grow." He goes on to talk about how our culture has successfully banned "mistakes from the public square." He explains why that's a problem:When we quit admitting we are wrong, we have quit growing. Growing up isn’t about growing perfect—it’s about growing out of our fear of imperfection. It’s about embracing that we all make mistakes—we’re all immature, we’re...
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